"Uh..."

Every panel is funny today. Every beat is a perfect measure, musical in precision.

"Uh, Liz?" is such a shitty opening for a come-on; it's unusual because it's real and recognizable, unlike Jon's usual gooniness which is an over-the-top placeholder for our own awkwardness.

"Yes?": Really, it's Liz's expression. "Uh, Liz?" is only two words, but they're so exact they can only mean one thing: you're gonna get totally, earnestly hit-upon. For whatever motivations of her own, Liz is happy about this, and that promise is what will fuel this joke. Because sometimes all you have to say is "Uh, Liz?", witness the scrunched expression of panic and cornered dismay. And that expression, my dear ones, is not funny in the least.

Jon, Panel 2: Jon and Garfield's poses are unwavering today, but the shades of meaning are like a rainbow. Well, a three-color rainbow. Here the eager confidence chills in Jon's chest, and though they're the same circles and dots, I swear I can see them glaze over with sick green fear.

Liz, Panel 2: And yes, Liz's face registers the shift between thinking Jon is sweet and deeply weird, but the sudden retraction of her hand from Garfield's back seals the deal: she wants so little to do with Jon that even touching his cat feels wrong.

Liz, Panel 3: There's not much space in Garfield for timing, but the disappearance of Liz is sudden enough for a laugh, and evocative. Did she run? No, she backed away slowly.

"I choked, didn't I?": Could be Jon blacked out in panel two. Could be he is in denial. Could be he wants confirmation because he really has no idea if Liz's terrified escape means he succeeded or not. Could be Jon doesn't even know what reaction he wanted. I'm happy with any of the above, because the laugh-aloud is Jon's frozen grimace and wide-eyed terror at what he's done. Hooray!

Garfield's punchline: Yeah, I laughed again.

Pussycat Pussycat Where Have You Been?

The best detail in this strip is Garfield rotating his head to listen to the conversation of two people standing two feet apart.

Panel three: Is it more insulting or pathetic that Jon thinks he can convince Liz that an appointment written in a notebook can be spontaneously cancelled? Myself I'm surprised that Jon owns a daily planner at all. My calendar just says "read Garfield" every day.

What does Garfield's coy smile mean? I'd like to think it's a timely Tale of Two Kitties reference, and because of Garfield's well-known animosity towards the royals, he's glad the Queen cancelled.

So... Panel one: Is Liz about to ask Jon out, before he gets too eager and blows it? Or am I suffering from the same delusions as Jon? It's not because I'm a Jon/Liz 'shipper. I just like the idea of Liz, who knows exactly what kind of bad investment Jon is, making herself unhappy by dating him anyway. Because the lifestuff of tragedy is the dried blood of comedy.

Paws On-Cup-orated

The awesomeness of Jon's ineptness with women is that he is not nerdy and shy around them, but nerdy and far too confident. Nebbishness wears thin for me, misguided bravado does not.

Yes, yes, Jon's pet name for Liz is weird and yes, would've been funnier if it were "Snooky-Wookiee", but I think we all know the meat here is in panel three. A lot of people would've had the punchline be that the overweight ugly receptionist gets excited by Jon's come-on, but Jim Davis allows no character to feel loved: she's horrified.

RE: Panel Three
-Surely I am not the only person who at first glance before reading the word balloons thought that in panel three Jon morphed into a fat lady named Nel? The layout of all three panels is so identical that there's no reason to suddenly think we've "cut" to a different building... especially since that happens about twice a year in Garfield. This might've been remedied by, say, putting Nel's computer on the opposite side of the frame, or her body in a position that doesn't exactly mirror Jon's. I offer these solutions though I don't want it remedied.

-As do all good veterinary receptionists, Nel keeps a green condom in her pencil cup.

-And a tiny blue Odie serves as Salacious Crumb to Nel's slug-bodied, earless Jabba.

MacGarfield Park is Melting in the Dark

... And now we're back in the park. As long as the week was going to end back in the park with Jon pestering women, why did he go home for a few days (hours?) in between? I guess to drop off Garfield. What is the weather like in Indiana that in the same week one woman can wear an evening dress on a power walk but another has to wear a turtleneck sweater and Capris?

... And O.M.G., she's reading Jon's yearbook!

As always, I like Jon's chipperness regarding the dating scene. Jon's depression seems to center around his home-life, and the generalized existential wasteland of the Garfield universe. When Arbuckle's around the ladies, he's like Wile E. Coyote. Does J.A. really think he has E.S.P? Unclear! Please please please let Garfield spiral off into a Dead Zone-derived plot about how Jon has ESP but can foresee only violence and destruction. I'm sure it would be a tonic to his problems if Jon could have a vision of Garfield's death.

Also: Is panel 3 the biggest word balloon in Garfield history? Must research. The terseness of Jon's pickup line ("I HAVE ESP") contrasts well with Blonde Lady's rant, and both draw welcome attention to Garfield's stubborn refusal to use periods at the end of sentences.

Also, also: What percentage of Garfields do not feature Garfield at all? We all must research.

Looks 10, Jon 0

I didn't realize the "Hitting on Girls in the Park" was going to be a running story this week. Also "excess of motion lines" will appear in today's strip.

Again, Jon's utter denial when it comes to rejection by women seems less "dumb" to me than "dangerously delusional." Based on Arbuckle's recoil surprise-take in panel 2, some part of him must know he's being insulted. Meanwhile, Garfield is ashamed because Jon can't get laid. Is Jon trying to maintain his cool in front of his cat?

I fully understand why any red-blooded American man would take a chance with this dish. I had no idea public parks were frequented Veronica Lodge lookalikes who go for walks in matching heels, evening dress and big plastic purple earrings. Good cripes, please investigate her crotch definition! That dress is not only impossibly form-fitting, but some colorist's erotic imagination went nutzo, and it's also very verrry shiny. Especially on the boobs... and ass... and... it's like she swaddled her lady-parts in SaranWrap.